"You are my hiding place
you will protect me from trouble
and surround me with songs of deliverance"
(Psalm 32:7)
i've been thinking that "deliverance" should be my Word of the year for 2013...
at first, my weary but still overactive (and often self-focused?) brain starting listing all of the situations from which i need deliverance...
Ohhhhh, it was a long list! (full of troubles!)
and then i thought how that was never going to happen...
(so, yes, i immediately sabotaged my own faith!)
but in the last couple of days, it's occurred to me that this deliverance i've been impressed to seek probably has very little to do with escaping actual problematic or troubling times...
it probably has a lot more to do with the state of my heart...
sadly, that state has not been all it should be....
there's been a great deal more panic than peace...
and a whole lot of coming unglued rather than gracefulness...
sure, there's been a little peace and grace...but the balance's been unbalanced....that's just the truth of it.
so i'm focusing on deliverance that's from the inside out...
and that's definitely outside of me and my own efforts...
deliverance that's grounded deep in trusting and fueled fully by the hope and joy and daily sustenance of the Lifegiving Lord....
i can't explain it very well, but i think it's already beginning...
i don't have superspiritual words to frame it, but my faith just might be growing a little stronger...
my 2nd blog post of 2012 included this quote:
"Tough Love means going down deep, to battle my own selfishness, my own anger, my own frustrations, my temptations to choose between being right over being gracious, to be the last word, to convince by arguing and harsh invectives, pinches and pricks, to Win.
When the going gets tough, the tough chooses love.
Tough love means Christ will win In Me at all costs." (Sarah Bessey)
i very much still need these words in 2013....and i still mean them....
i will allow Love to change me....remake me, remold me.....delivering me into a person who is more Christlike, more honest, more aware and more usable in the Kingdom.
