~ Sunday afternoon daybook : November 30th ~

Outside my window....it is hot again....we've had some very cold weather: coats, scarfs, the whole deal....but today is hot again and i'm not liking it.

I am thinking...that i am barely getting in under the wire on blogging this month...tomorrow will be December....unbelievable!! hardly anyone blogs anymore...(well, besides the famous bloggers) but a few of us soldier on:)

I am drinking...coffee. "i could not go on without it i know" to paraphrase a gospel song. seriously, i would not be functional without it. Early mornings are a killer for me...and Coffee is a saving grace! 

In the kitchen...i am learning how to make bigger quantities...big pots of soup that last for several days; my buying time is limited, so i am having to be a crazy planner...or no one in this house would eat. *sigh*

I am listening...to the Saints game! can't say i'm enjoying that all so much...sometimes i'm "into" such things....lately, not really. the noise of the game annoys me...

I am needing....to say no more. i've overcommited to things for Christmas...and somehow i guess i will survive this season, but in the future i must decrease obligations in order to stay sane...(this idea is not titled "learning" since i never seem to learn this lesson! or, rather, i seem to have to keep learning it!!)

I am reading...the Mitford series...i've never read through all of it and i am thankful to have these beautiful books to read now in this very stressful season of life. It is so well written...so, so sweet...calming...better than therapy!:) i want to marry Father Tim:)

I am looking forward to... my trip to Haiti!! (January 10-19) so very grateful that my $$ is basically complete...thankful for all of the folks who have given...

I am missing... friends of the heart who seem too far away...it is true that as adults we have to buck up and accept changes of reality and in relationships....but that is easier said than done.

Around the house...things are messy. My Mom says this is not true and i need to stop telling people things are a mess....i appreciate her sweet support...but i know the truth! i should be working right now to make it more tidy...

I am thankful....to not be as anxious about the upcoming holidays as i sometimes am...And that my parents seem to be doing ok with my working...

I am pondering: "identity"...how fluid and how defining it is in our lives...

a quote that's speaking to me: "Anticipate difficulties; bank on grace" (Bob Goff) so many of his words speak to me, but today these are the ones...
oh, do i ever anticipate problems!!...in reality, this self preserving mindset makes good sense in my life (although overdoing that tendency is easy) and (thankfully) i DO bank on grace...how aware i am of how useless i am without it! but how much more of His grace i need...

A few plans for the rest of the week: keep my head afloat at work...go to bed earlier...final practices for next Sunday's choral concert (we're singing "the Messiah"...i have esp. needed those words this year)...finish up a little more decorating and getting the house ready for Christmas guests...

A peek into my life: 

somehow, someway the decorating always seems to get done...and we so enjoy it, even with all the imperfections. my prayer is that this Advent and Christmas season will not be just one more happening that rushes by in a blur....that even in this time of transition and weariness, my eyes will be open to His presence...